where you still haven’t brushed your teeth yet,
and lunch was a battle,
and the five-year old is in time out until she’s ten year’s old,
and you just picked up the Candy Land cards from all over the floor,
and the two-year old just found your secret stash of Christmas presents,
and the two-year old is still boycotting her lunch,
and you ruined the alfredo sauce that you were planning on making for the meal you’ve committed to bringing someone tonight,
and (just this once) you pop open an after-lunch beer,
and it spills all over your yoga pants and your Birkenstocks,
and you mutter something under your breath,
and the two-year old giggles,
“Mommy said !fuck!”
And it’s not even noon yet?
Nah, me neither.